things i have discovered while trying to avoid work

Procrastination can yield a multitude of things. Overwhelming feelings of frustration, restlessness, and bouts of self-criticism. But rather than focus on my shortcomings (which I have been doing for like five hours now), I will instead use this as a learning experience. Here are valuable lessons I have taken from today.

I can tie my hair in a knot and it will stay. Since my hair’s so long now, I can wind it in a bun and tuck the end under. Also, it’s really soft. Conditioner was a good investment.

I rock at mahjong. It’s probably because I’m an old woman. Or because of the saying, “Lucky in cards, unlucky in love.” That was a downer.

Taping a piece of tissue paper sprayed with baby cologne on the air conditioner gives the whole room added freshness. Unfortunately, this freshness is not conducive to my productivity. It makes me

want to sit in my chair with my eyes closed and simply breathe.

My godfather makes really really yummy French fries (Filipino fries?). I ate an entire bowlful, washed down with Four Seasons juice. My life is so hard right now.

I was a super cute baby. Legit though. Watching baby videos of myself is such a weird experience. Maybe I’ll write about it in the future. I also now know what I looked like when I pooped. And what my creepy alien voice sounded like.

Making faces at people until they notice is really fun. It’s a skill I’d like to hone in years to come. I consider myself an amateur at this point in time, but I hope to advance to a professional level. Best. Job. Ever.